Recreating
Self, Recreating Life
Every day of my life I can create what I want. For example, I created this blog. It is a small thing, but the fact that I am the father of this piece gives me a huge kick.
Every day of my life I can create what I want. For example, I created this blog. It is a small thing, but the fact that I am the father of this piece gives me a huge kick.
It is now three-and-a-half years since I left Max New
York Life as a Zonal Training Head to start out on my own. This
period has been incredible to say the least. The process of
recreating self to create a life of my dreams has been fascinating.
Along the way, I have made some mistakes – and some serious ones --
which have only made me better and stronger. In this journey, you pay
for your mistakes, there is no pardon.
A lot of people ask me how I am doing after I quit my
job. It is a straightforward question for which unfortunately I have
no straightforward answer because I haven't quite made the money as
yet that can make me feel successful, or give the world the
confidence that the risk is worth taking. Yet, in this period, is it
any less achievement for a middle class boy next door to have earned
every single rupee on the might of his own talent and effort than on
the back of an employer's judgement of how good or bad he is? Having
said this, leaving a well paying job and pursuing a purpose is a
gutsy decision, for it is fraught with danger of failure, which, if
not handled well, can not only set you back professionally, but also
dent your confidence and morale.
Money is an important measurement of success, but to
treat it as the sole measurement robs one of the charm of exploring
the journey of one's chosen path. Success is truly a journey, not a
destination, and I have never understood this more than in this last
three-and-a-half years. This journey takes me to various places,
makes me meet different types of people, and more importantly, it has
provided me with the opportunity to create my own little milestones.
What keeps me going despite various hurdles, rejections and problems
is the opportunity to create what I want. My decision to leave my job
was not just a way to buy my freedom, but critically, it was to throw
open the world, so that limitless opportunities and possibilities can
open up.
Every day of my life I can create what I want. For
example, I created this blog. It is a small thing, but the fact that
I am the father of this piece gives me a huge kick. Every day of my
life is an opportunity to create something, or put in place a
foundation or process to create something later. In the period
since I started out on my own, I have come to value my thoughts and
emotions more than ever before, for now I am accountable for
everything that happens. While it is not easy to feel responsible for
every minute of one's life, it is incredibly fascinating that within
this sense of responsibility lies the immense and continuous
opportunity to create, recreate and create.
The most important aspect of recreating my life has been
the process of recreating myself. It is always an arduous task to
change oneself, for it is not pleasant to know that you lack
something. It also calls for constant learning and adaptability to
different situations. While it is fascinating to have a limitless
opportunity to create, being on your own also exposes you to the
various dynamics of life, as in a job, we live a cocooned life, where
the dynamics are predictable, even if varied. When you decide to earn
a living on your own terms, it extracts a price – and that price is
inculcation of an ability to feel certain within constant
uncertainty. I have realised that if you want to stay put on the
journey and have decided to make it an irreversible process, the only
way is to stay positive at all points of time. It is tough to stay so
positively positive, but really there is no choice if the choice is
not to go back to a past paradigm of life.
While I struggle and march on to recreate my life, the
only thing I constantly seek is to be able to continue on this
journey. More than the little successes I have created, or the
setbacks I have had to handle from time to time, I am completely
hooked on to this journey. I have come to truly love this process of
learning, being, and doing. As long as I stay on this journey, I can
consider myself to be successful, for success is truly a journey, not
a destination.
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